Lazies

You know what really grinds my gears?

People who push the Handicap automatic door opener when they are just fine to open the door themselves.

You're just being lazy. And lazy people grind my gears.

Hilary

You know what really grinds my gears?


Hillary Clinton.





Just because your husband was good at the job, doesn't mean you will be too. It's not like you want your pilot's wife landing the plane. Or your heart surgen's trophy bitch coming off the country club tennis court just glistening with sweat to perform your triple bypass. It just doesn't add up Hillbo.

Movie theater clappers

You know what grinds my gears?



Movie theater clappers.


It's bad enough I already have to deal with movie theater talkers, movie theater phone answerers, and movie theater seat savers (ya know, the one lady who gets there really early and lays her coat and purse across 10 seats in a newly released movie and the "rest" of her group, which usually turns out to be 1 or 2 others, come 1 minute AFTER the movie started) but I've come to see that clapping in the theaters has become evermore popular. What? Do you think the actors can hear your approval? Well they can't. So stop. Please. It's annoying. It's not the damn dinner theater.

Lemons

You know what really grinds my gears?

When a waiter puts lemon in my water.

I didn't say, "Yea, I'll take water with lemon." I asked for a simple, damn WATER. It's not like I live in Texas where the lemon's purpose is to hide the disgusting taste of the dirty river water. Our tap water comes straight from glaciers. I really like my glacier tap water plain and tasty and not all contaminated with seeds and yellow pulp thank you very much.

Guest Grinder

This grinds someone's gears and I don't know who he is, he sent it to me anonymously. I think it's fucking hilarious:

"You know what really grinds my gears?

Buffet restaurants that try to pass off Sloppy Joe meat as Taco meat. Don't they know the difference? Don't they know I'll know the difference? Ok, I know my meats. I'm a meat expert. And there is NO comparison between Sloppy Joe meat and Taco meat."

Well thank you for sharing!

HOLD

You know what really grinds my gears?

When the phone rings, you pick up, and you hear, "Please hold, there is a very important call on the line."

ahhhh FUCK NO. I don't hold for NOBODY, especially if YOU call ME.

Lefty-potheads

You know what really grinds my gears?

College-aged kids who call themselves "liberal" or associate with the Left Wing just because they smoke pot.

You're not a liberal. You're just a fucking stoner.