Jack fucking Black

You know what really grinds my gears?

Jack Black.

I can't decide if I'm supposed to like him or hate him. He is fucking hilarious and I love Tenacious D. But homeboy is a college drop out and feels the need to "educate" the world on politics and tell you who and who not to vote for. Mr. Black, if you stick to singing to me about the "Greatest song in the world" and being a giant shit show I will go see your animated fighting Panda movie. But keep up the political rampage bullshit and I will burn your CD.

AXE

You know what really grinds my gears?

People who pronounce the word "ask" like "axe."

I'm all for diversity and I understand that some people have different "axents" but refusing to say the "s" before the "k" and therefore not only just adding your own little spin on the word but creating a completely different word, is just plain lazy if you ask me.

V-necks

You know what really grinds my gears?

Guys who wear a white V-neck undershirt without wearing a shirt over it.

As seen below, this guy looks like a total tool. That is unless of course he's European or gay. Because Europeans and gay guys can pull off whatever the damn well please.

Coffee and straws

You know what really grinds my gears?

People who drink hot coffee out of a straw so they don't turn their teeth yellow. Really? You guys are as bad as the girls who drink bottled beer out of straws.

And you want to know what's even worse? These idiots are making other people rich by using the "Java Wand" which promises to "Keep your smile white!" BULLSHIT

*Note: It is entirely appropriate to drink ICED coffee out of a straw*

Double commercials

You know what really grinds my gears?

When they show one commercial TWICE in one commerical break from my favorite television shows. You might be asking, "well why don't you change the channel during the commerical break?" Well because when I'm watching Are You Smarter Than A Fifth Grader and Jeff Foxworthy says, "For the question: what country is the furthest EAST of these three: Brazil, Argentina, or Uraguay, Brian answered, Brazil, is he correct?...... We'll find out AFTER the break!" And with the studio audience I give a big OHHHHHHHaaaahhhh. And even though I know the answer is Brazil and the fifth grader MacKenzie who said Argentina is WRONG, I can't stand thinking I will miss coming back from commercial break to see the 35 year old investment banker rub it into the face of poor little 11 year old MacKenzie because she got the answer wrong and in this one case, he is indeed smarter than a fifth grader. Congratulations, want a cookie?



But anyways, to get back to the point, I'm sitting there waiting for this priceless moment, painfully suffering through the commercials when I not only have to see each one, once, but there's always one they show twice. And that certainly grinds my gears.