The fact that Brad Hawpe has a Nickelback song for his up-to-bat song.
Here's a little diddy about Brad Hawpe and a Nickelback song....
I was lucky enough to be able to attend two Rockies games this weekend and see three players who will be competing in tonight's MLB All Star game: The Rockies' Brad Hawpe and Jason Marquis, and Atlanta's Brian McCann. On Saturday night, I was sitting up in the 3rd deck eating a soft pretzel dipped in a cheese cup and drinking my 11teenth beer when I thought I might have heard what sounded like Brad Hawpe walking up to bat while Nickelback's "Rock Star" blared in the background. Fortunately I was 15 sheets to the wind and was able to push it out of my mind.
Sunday, after obliterating my memory the night before, I settled into shaded, first deck seats with my brother and 92 year old grandfather with a new soft pretzel, new cheese cup, and this time a gigantic diet coke, hoping for a Rockies win. Low and behold Brad Hawpe approaches home plate and what do I hear in my hungover and pounding head? 'Rock Star' by none other than Nickleback. As you can imagine, this greatly upsets me. I explode at TLittle, "Are you fucking serious? Our All Star representative has a NICKELBACK song for his at-bat music? You've got to be fucking kidding me. No, this won't do. I will not let Brad Hawpe represent me, my team, and the whole goddamn state of Colorado if he listens to Nickelback." Then slowly, my ears began to bleed from Chad Kroeger beginning to belt out the few vowels and consonants he ever learned in his life... Not really, but it felt like it...
TLittle tried to defend him by saying, "I don't know that that is really his song, sometimes they just play random music." I took this into account because we had already heard around six MJ songs. I settled back into my chair, absorbing the other batter's song choices. Obviously Todd Helton has a great country song and pleasingly Garrett Atkins had Timbland's 'What I are' playing as he approached the plate. I waited anxious and hopeful that when Hawpe came back around, the song playing would be anything, ANYTHING but Nickelback... alas, "We all just wanna be big rocktards etc etc other poetic lyrics" came playing yet again. I was crushed. Why Brad Hawpe? Why????
2 comments:
Okay, I admit that I like Nickelback enough to see them in concert. They certainly aren't my favorite, but I'd do the drummer in a fucking HEARTBEAT!
That's really what it's always about, right? ;)
Sounds like you need to stick to the saturday night strategy of drinking heavily to undermine any brain cells that might be capable of hearing nickelback and understanding when and why its playing.
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